Marathon Man - 3/5

This movie is a capable thriller, but some of the tense scenes have cheap, underwhelming reversals. The setup is great and much of the runtime is devoted to dwelling in the uncertainty of the protagonist’s position. There’s a torture scene that seemed mostly pointless to dwell on in retrospect, and the ending is downright out of character. But for a tense, paranoid conspiracy thriller you could do a lot worse.

Closest comparison: It’s like Enemy of the State by way of Three Days of the Condor.

Setting: Espionage
Plot: Espionage
Tone: Thriller

Another Thin Man - 3/5

This movie is the first sequel that starts the franchise heading in a more family friendly direction. The family-centered escapade scenes are quaint and could have been passable in their own right, but are not worth the accompanying decrease in effort that was put into the central mystery. As it is, the mystery is decent and the reveal is a bit obscure, but the story is fun and keeps the franchise going well enough.

Closest comparison: It’s like The Spanish Chest by way of The Thin Man.

Setting: Drama
Plot: Mystery
Tone: Comedy

Amacord - 2/5

This movie is meandering and pointless, though endearing in its quaintness. There is no plot. The cinematography is solid and the characters are pretty vivid, but there’s no substance to this vapid waste of time.

Content warning: female nudity

Closest comparison: It’s like The Bicycle Thief by way of Rififi.

Setting: Drama
Plot: <None>
Tone: DocuDrama

Act of Valor - 4/5

This movie is remarkable in that its ‘larger than life’ parts are the accurate ones and it’s the interpersonal drama, if anything, that feels less believable. The main stain on this film is the acting, since so many of the main cast is playing themselves and aren’t professional actors, but since that’s the main draw of the film the criticism only goes so far. The production values are up to the task of portraying modern military maneuvers, which helps make up for the acting and cookie-cutter plot.

Content warning: torture

Closest comparison: It’s like Kampen om tungtvannet (1948) by way of American Sniper.

Setting: Military
Plot: Military
Tone: Military

The Circus (1928) - 3/5

This movie is pretty standard far for Charlie Chaplin. It’s got his signature slapstick, the standard boy-meets-girl narrative, and the pacing and stakes of its era. But for all that it’s still a solid film today, not as ponderously slow as many of its peers but not as break-neck as many comedies today. For those who aren’t too cynical to enjoy a heartfelt older film, you could do a whole lot worse than this.

Closest comparison: It’s more like Modern Times than it is like City Lights.

Setting: Comedy
Plot: Comedy
Tone: Comedy

Constantine: City of Demons - 1/5

This movie is extremely gory and horrific for an animated feature, with lots of depictions of demons, hell, and innocent souls in torment, with some sexuality thrown in just to make it more uncomfortable. Fans of Constantine specifically may enjoy it, but casual super hero enthusiasts should give this one a miss.

Content warning: gore, torture

Closest comparison: It’s like a cross between Dr. Strange and Hellraiser.

Setting: Hidden World
Plot: Super Hero
Tone: Horror

Overboard (1987) - 2/5

This movie has a lot of heart, but loses its way in the middle. The sweet undertone of the movie is tinged with an unshakeable creepiness, and although the leads have a lot of chemistry it’s a strange cocktail all told. It’s a fair enough premise that goes a bit wonky in the execution.

Closest comparison: It’s like The Prince and the Pauper by way of Maid in Manhattan.

Setting: Comedy
Plot: Comedy
Tone: RomCom

After the Thin Man - 4/5

This movie is an excellent sophomore entry in the series, not eclipsing the original but holding its own as both a sequel and standalone murder mystery. The protagonist pair is a delight to watch, as before, and the solution to the mystery is excellent.

Closest comparison: It’s like The Thin Man, leaning a bit toward Murder on the Orient Express.

Setting: Period RomCom
Plot: Mystery
Tone: Mysery

The Thin Man (1934) - 4/5

This is an excellent cozy mystery, with enough of a veneer of noir to appeal to even those who are indifferent to the genre. The chemistry between William Powell and Myrna Loy is as palpable as it is adorable, and somehow manages not to detract from the mystery but enhance it. Everyone is a viable suspect until the last clue is in place, and the mystery comes together very well in the end.

Closest comparison: It’s like Partners in Crime (1983) by way of The Maltese Falcon.

Setting: Noir
Plot: Mystery
Tone: Romantic Comedy

The Two Jakes (1990) - 2/5

This movie is a dependent sequel to Chinatown, and you may be somewhat lost unless you have a good recall. It’s not as sordid as its predecessor but it’s also not as gripping, plodding along vaguely until it peters out at the final solution. It retreads many of the superficial beats of the first film, too, using formula as ersatz meaning.

Closest comparison: It’s like The Long Goodbye by way of Chinatown.

Setting: Noir
Plot: Detective
Tone: Detective

Blood Simple - 3/5

This movie is a decent modern crime thriller, with a surprisingly effective antagonist and some great suspenseful scenes. Unfortunately, some other scenes are drawn out so long they fall flat and there are one or two comebacks characters make that are so unbelievable that it undercuts the stakes of the film. Nevertheless, it’s a bold entry into the noir genre and definitely worth a watch for those who don’t mind subject matter that gets a bit gritty.

Closest comparison: It’s like No Country for Old Men by way of Fargo.

Setting: Noir
Plot: Crime
Tone: Thriller

Bad Times at the El Royale - 3/5

This movie is wonderfully acted conglomeration of characters, each of whom has a sordid past that is slowly revealed over the course of the film. But the draw is the vivid characters chewing the scenery more than anything, and while it starts off very strong the third act is one of the more boring climaxes the screenwriters could have chosen. Still, it’s fun watching the fireworks.

Content warning: brief background nudity

Closest comparison: It’s like if The Hateful Eight were directed by the Coen Brothers.

Setting: Mystery
Plot: Crime
Tone: Thriller

The Lost City (2022) - 3/5

This movie is a return to an ‘80s style of plot, which I appreciate, with a modern veneer, which I appreciate less. The adventure and romance parts are more goofy than heartfelt, but a fair amount of the comedy lands reasonably well, enough to carry the movie anyway. Everyone is hamming it up in their roles and the film seems to know what it is and never tries to take itself too seriously. It’s familiar, which makes it predictable, but its predictability is comfortable and accessible.

Closest comparison: It’s like Romancing the Stone by way of 21 Jump Street.

Setting: Adventure
Plot: Adventure
Tone: RomCom

It Happened One Night (1934) - 3/5

This is a pretty straightforward romantic comedy of the era. Clark Gable is clearly having the most fun out of anyone in making this movie, which lends a refreshing kinetic presence as the plot plods along. It’s a charming diversion, which is all it really needs to be.

Closest comparison: It’s like The Philadelphia Story by way of You Can’t Take It With You (1938).

Setting: Adventure
Plot: Romantic Comedy
Tone: Comedy

The Artist (2011) - 3/5

This movie’s main faults are being sappy and pretentious, but on the whole it works out pretty well. While the ‘silent treatment’ is a gimmick the film understands how to convey its story through the restricted medium and carries a sufficiently compelling narrative. The scant times it breaks convention it does so to great effect, not distracting from the story but propelling it forward.

Closest comparison: It’s like Stan & Ollie by way of Silent Movie.

Setting: Navel-gazing
Plot: Changing Times
Tone: Dramedy

Batman: Gotham Knight - 3/5

This movie is a collection of shorts, related by plot but unrelated in direction, voice acting, or artstyle. The end result is an interesting amalgam of artistic differences, but the story throughline is a solid genre narrative. I found most of the artstyles to be offputting, but if you like them you’ll enjoy this movie more than I did.

Closest comparison: It’s like the Animatrix by way of Batman: The Long Halloween.

Setting: Noir
Plot: Super Hero
Tone: Noir

Cobra (1986) - 3/5

This movie promises to be a fun ‘buddy cop’ style action flick, but is in fact a tense, slow-burn serial killer thriller. Of course there are a few action scenes, including the final showdown, and plenty of Stallone being Stallone but its mainstay is gritty crime thriller.

Closest comparison: It’s like Tango & Cash by way of Blue Steel.

Setting: Buddy Cop
Plot: Serial Killer
Tone: Horror/Thriller

Glass Onion (2022) - 1/5

This movie is starts off fairly strong, but finishes abysmally. The cinematography, costume design, sets, acting, etc. are all top notch but their impact all hinges on the solution to the murder mystery, and the solution here is simultaneously stupid, ignorant, and insulting. The film is also continually horny, and seems to exemplify the thing it’s mocking which is never a good sign. There’s an overt political subtext that overtakes the narrative at a certain point, and in the end many of the carefully laid clues don’t make sense.

Closest comparison: It’s like an attempt at a mystery like Knives Out, as clumsily executed as The King’s Man, with a veneer of Fool’s Gold.

Setting: Mystery
Plot: Mystery
Tone: Mystery

Reminiscence (2021) - 3/5

This movie is a modern noir with impeccable aesthetics and a solid story. The telling of that story, however, gets a little convoluted and some of the rabbit trails seem more like a waste of time than interesting diversions. It’s a little too self-absorbed, a little too horny, a little too distracted, but the overall impact is still fun and it lands the ending which carries a lot of water for this film.

Closest comparison: It’s like the Maltese Falcon by way of Love, Death, and Robots.

Setting: Sci-Fi
Plot: Detective
Tone: Noir

Sabotage (1936) - 3/5

This is a tense thriller that overall is quite good but goes too far. It’s an early Hitchcock and serves as a good ‘before’ snapshot against which to compare his later, better works. The ending is much less satisfying than it could have been with a few plot tweaks, although the tension and plot reveals work well throughout.

Closest comparison: It’s like Notorious by way of The 39 Steps.

Setting: Drama
Plot: Espionage
Tone: Thriller