Glass Onion (2022) - 1/5

This movie is starts off fairly strong, but finishes abysmally. The cinematography, costume design, sets, acting, etc. are all top notch but their impact all hinges on the solution to the murder mystery, and the solution here is simultaneously stupid, ignorant, and insulting. The film is also continually horny, and seems to exemplify the thing it’s mocking which is never a good sign. There’s an overt political subtext that overtakes the narrative at a certain point, and in the end many of the carefully laid clues don’t make sense.

Closest comparison: It’s like an attempt at a mystery like Knives Out, as clumsily executed as The King’s Man, with a veneer of Fool’s Gold.

Setting: Mystery
Plot: Mystery
Tone: Mystery

The Matrix Resurrections - 1/5

This movie would be hillariously bad if it weren’t so boring. It makes incessant references to the previous films, calls them out, and goes nowhere with them beyond surface-level nostalgic fan service. Keanu Reeves and Carrie-Anne Moss are fine doing their standard routine, but Jessica Henwick and Neil Patrick Harris bust out great performances for what they’re worth. The messaging is very muddled, and usually shakes out to mean the opposite of what it is meant to. The action is downright pitiful, all close-up shaky-cam nonsense with no sense of who is doing what or even what the stakes are most of the time; it’s easily the worst action I’ve seen all year.

Closest comparison: It’s like The Matrix: Reloaded by way of Jupiter Ascending.

Setting: Sci-Fi
Plot: Hidden World
Tone: Coffee Shop Drama