Intolerable Cruelty - 3/5

This is a comedy about prenuptial agreements, a sardonic look at marriage as only the Coen brothers can create. Like the other weaker entries in their repertoire it lacks the conviction to make an actual point, undoing any potential statements the film could be making. Instead it employs comedic dissolution that undercuts any impact the plot could have had, turning it from a poignant satire into a mere farce. For all that it’s still very entertaining, well written and acted enough to form a baseline for other movies of the genre.

Closest comparison: It’s like Marriage Story by way of O, Brother Where Art Thou.

Setting: Drama
Plot: Intrigue
Tone: Dramedy

Guardians (2017) - 2/5

This movie is so bad it’s good, but still manages to overstay its welcome. The basic ideas are solid: new combination of superpowers, acceptable plot, unique villain. But there’s a lot of backstory that doesn’t amount to anything and never really gets a satisfying payoff. There’s a lot of sketchy CGI especially when compared with Avengers that came out about 5 year earlier, since it’s clearly an inspiration for this film. There are some neat gems buried in this movie but not enough to make it worth your while.

Closest comparison: It’s like Captain America: The Winter Soldier by way of The Last Airbender (2010).

Setting: Superhero
Plot: Superhero
Tone: Superhero

Darby O'Gill and the Little People - 3/5

This is an adorable tour through Disney-fied Irish lore that touches on more than just leprechauns, though they are overwhelmingly the focus. The effects mostly hold up quite well, and a few of the scenes are actually impressively filmed. Still, the story’s quaintly rambling and there are several dubious plot contrivances. But on the whole it’s a worthwhile family film.

Closest comparison: It’s like The Secret of Kells by way of Behind the Waterfall.

Setting: Fantasy
Plot: Adventure
Tone: Family

The Sword in the Stone - 3/5

This is a fun family classic that doesn’t have staying power beyond the superficial. It wisely adopts a simple, straightforward plot, instead of the more complicated storylines of the novel by the same name or The Once And Future King. Instead the bulk of the film is dedicated to training antics which allows it to show off its main fantasy element: Merlin’s magic. The wizard’s duel is the most iconic scene and rightly so, as the rest of the movie is basically an extension of those few minutes, and makes it a solid entry in the catalog of classic Disney films.

Closest comparison: It’s like The Jungle Book (1967) by way of The Black Cauldron (1985).

Setting: Adventure
Plot: Fantasy
Tone: Family Comedy

Monster Hunter (2020) - 3/5

This movie is a fun action romp with a few glaring problems which, if overlooked, make for a very enjoyable experience. Initially it has military horror vibes in line with the directors previous films, but eventually it morphs into a love letter to the video games in its own excitable way. Ron Pearlman phones in his lines and there are several plot contrivances, but the action is excellent and the CGI vividly brings the monsters to life. Fans of the game will see a lot that they recognize, and in a few places won’t see some things they may expect. It’s one of the best video game adaptations, but that’s not a high bar.

Closest comparison: It’s like the action horror of Resident Evil (2002) that morphs into the action scenes from The Witcher.

Setting: Fantasy
Plot: Adventure
Tone: Horror, then Action

The Mandalorian (Season 2, Disney+) - 2/5

The second season of The Mandalorian keeps introducing great characters, moments, and setpieces like the first season, it sprinkles in painfully terrible characters, dialogue, and character choices. The action is often good, though sometimes absolutely terrible, and Amy Sedaris, Sasha Banks, Katee Sackhoff, and even occasionally Rosario Dawson are painfully grating every instant they are on screen. Boba Fett gets many outstanding moments that fans will appreciate, though he gets Worf’ed in another pointless and irritating scene. Overall it’s like nice dinner of filet mignon and lobster tail with a diarrhea gravy; the wonderful things in this show get completely ruined by the vomit-inducing parts. If you can ignore the bad and enjoy the good, or just have selective memory, then it’s worth a watch.

Closest comparison: This is the Shanghai Nights of the Star Wars saga.

Setting: Sci-Fi
Plot: Western
Tone: Adventure

Leviathan (1989) - 4/5

This movie is a solid entry into the creature horror genre. It builds on many established genre classics, swapping the space setting of Alien for deep sea, splicing in a sizeable dose of The Thing’s body horror for good measure. There’s substantial chemistry with real depth and connection, and the effects are better than the budget could have predicted. If you like ‘80s horror movies and haven’t seen it, you owe it to yourself to check it out.

Closest comparison: It’s like Alien by way of Sphere.

Setting: Isolation
Plot: Horror
Tone: Disaster

The Fiction Makers - 2/5

This is a feature film-length episode of The Saint (1962-1968), complete with tongue-in-cheek comedy bond tone and kitschy BBC production values. The plot is as over-the-top and unbelievable as the most outlandish James Bond films, but the tone knowingly goes along with a smirk and a wink at the audience. It’s a fun, silly movie that unfortunately doesn’t have the legs to make it to the end.

Closest comparison: It’s like James Bond by way of The Avengers (1961 show, with John Steed and Emma Peel).

Setting: Rural British Drama
Plot: Outlandish Spy
Tone: Campy Comedy

Rudy - 5/5

This is THE ‘kid’s got heart’ movie. It’s a straightforward, down-to-earth story of overcoming odds and pursuing a dream, beautifully executed with tangible stakes and devil-may-mock attitude shining in the face of the haters. It confidently executes a by-the-numbers plot, unashamedly reveling in its sincerity and putting in the legwork to make the ending feel earned. There’s no substitute; this film simply does this type of story better than any other.

Closest comparison: It’s like The Pursuit of Happyness by way of Remember the Titans.

Setting: Sports Drama
Plot: Overcoming Adversity
Tone: Inspirational Drama

Big Hero 6 - 4/5

This is more than a good family super hero movie. It stands on its own with a good story, excellent pacing, and a lot of heart. It’s earnestly funny and doesn’t subvert its established rules for the sake of a quick joke, a mistake common to far too many of its peers. The superpowers are interesting and creatively implemented, the villain is unique, memorable, and flushed out. Sure, it’s childish in a few places and whenever someone says, “Woman up,” it’s cringe-inducing, but those nitpicks aren’t enough to bring the rest of the movie down with them.

Closest comparison: It’s like Iron Man by way of Frozen.

Setting: Super Hero
Plot: Super Hero
Tone: Family Adventure

Oscar - 4/5

This is a classic stage-style comedy in the guise of a 1920’s mobster movie. It starts off a bit slow and takes its time speeding up, but once it gets up to speed it sings. A romanticized version of the amiable cultural sensibilities of the time come through in the best way, creating palpable style and blending with its stage play ambience to produce an immensely enjoyable shell game of misunderstandings and marriage proposals gone awry. It’s pleasant and joyful, a welcome change of pace.

Closest comparison: It’s like The Importance of Being Earnest in the garb of Mickey Blue Eyes

Setting: Gangster
Plot: Comedy of Errors
Tone: Dramedy

Romancing the Stone - 3/5

This movie is a parody of its own genre, trying at once to make fun of and be an adventure clone in the vein of Indiana Jones. And for that it largely succeeds, though many of the jokes fell flat for me and there’s too much mundanity to really make it an enduring classic. The lead actors fail to exude the confident charisma needed for the genre, with generally average performances that should have been stellar.

Content warning: Brief female nudity

Closest comparison: It’s like Galaxy Quest by way of Indiana Jones

Setting: Exotic Adventure
Plot: Adventure Parody
Tone: Action Adventure

Bedknobs and Broomsticks - 2/5

This movie is a mild failure on many levels. Its setup is a ripoff of Mary Poppins and The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe, the child characters are fairly unlikeable, and the cartoon other world has no internal consistency of theme. It has a great nugget of an idea in the Witches Correspondence School subplot, but it gets lost in the shuffle of “and now this is happening” plot beats. The finale is a good idea on paper but leaves excitement on the table in favor of what were at the time impressive visuals.

Closest comparison: It’s like Mary Poppins by way of The Russians Are Coming The Russians Are Coming, without the self-awareness.

Setting: Civilian War
Plot: Hidden World
Tone: Family

The Rescuers Down Under (1990) - 3/5

This fun family adventure follow-up to its dour masterpiece predecessor leaves something to be desired. It’s a great romp and if taken on its own merits is a pretty solid Disney fare, but when compared to its earlier installment has as much depth as a kiddie pool. There are several creative plot turns that keep it interesting for more seasoned viewers and some great cinematography to keep the whole family entertained. It throws in several ‘funny’ scenes apparently for younger viewers that stumble the pacing and introduce a mean humor that runs at odds to the emotional core of the story.

Closest comparison: It’s like The Rescuers by way of Treasure Planet.

Setting: Adventure
Plot: Rescue
Tone: Family

The Rescuers (1977) - 5/5

This is an understated contemplation on the nature of faith in the face of hopelessness. It boasts an unrelentingly bleak atmosphere that it douses with equally unrelenting heart. In true Don Bluth fashion the silliness is limited to a flavor of villain caricature and avoids affecting the plot. Instead, it allows the story themes to play out with a lot of depth without becoming too intense for more sensitive viewers. It’s masterfully executed and achieves its conservatively ambitious goal with real staying power for those not driven off by the family-friendly aesthetic.

Closest comparison: It’s like The Pursuit of Happyness by way of The Great Mouse Detective.

Setting: Crime
Plot: Adventure
Tone: Film Noir

The Shootist - 4/5

This movie is a thoughtful, melancholy look at the Western genre. Casting John Wayne in the lead lends a lot of depth to the role, since the film is an introspection on the kinds of films he’s known for starring in. It’s not heavy on action, though there’s enough, and the narrative is more interested in what it is to be a gunfighter and what that does to someone over a lifetime of violence. It’s a well-conceived story and excellently acted, definitely worth a watch for anyone who’s a fan of the classic John Wayne westerns.

Closest comparison: It’s like Wild Strawberries by way of The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance.

Setting: Western
Plot: Reminiscence
Tone: Drama

The Computer Wore Tennis Shoes - 2/5

This little gem is mostly fine, but its dated aesthetics and excess silliness at the end make it drop just shy of ‘fine’. It’s an interesting look at a young Kurt Russell, but on the whole the acting, characters, and overall feel is vapid live action DIsney family fare. It’s not as funny as That Darn Cat or as heartfelt as Darby O’Gill and the Little People, which has only added to its justifiable obscurity over the decades.

Closest comparison: It’s like Phenomenon (1996) by way of Not Quite Human (1987).

Setting: College Comedy
Plot: Superhero
Tone: Family Comedy

Robin Hood (1973) - 5/5

This is one of the two most classic Robin Hood adaptations every put on screen, and it does not disappoint. This family adaptation doesn’t shy away from the hopeless plight of the villagers, and the theme of hopelessness doesn’t interfere with the swashbuckling adventure. The silliness here is kept to a minimum when compared to similar Disney fare, and never gets to the point where it might begin to affect the plot. It’s fun, creative, charismatic, and the whole movie is downright iconic, from Friar Tuck to the stork disguise at the archery tournament.

Closest comparison: It’s like The Adventures of Robin Hood (1938) by way of The Sword in the Stone (Disney).

Setting: Action Adventure
Plot: Heist Adventure
Tone: Family Adventure

Murder by Death - 3/5

This is a dumb screwball comedy that works pretty well, all things considered. The mystery is nonexistant, but constantly changes its own rules and is very much not the point of the story. Instead, the draw of the film is the sheer audacity of the premise and jokes, hoping to keep a quick enough pace that its audience won’t raise an incredulous eyebrow at its nonsense. Its satire of the (relatively) famous detectives is less scathing commentary than it is silly caricature and as such it is an enjoyable, if forgettable, romp.

Closest comparison: It’s like Spaceballs by way of Clue: The Movie.

Setting: Mystery
Plot: Screwball Comedy
Tone: Dry Comedy

The Mechanic (1972) - 3/5

This movie starts off promising an interesting series of assassinations made to look like accidents, but ends up just being another run-of-the-mill 70’s action movie. It lags almost immediately and by the time it finally gets back around to the action it’s too little too late. It’s decent enough action, but the plot detours are so bizarre and unrelated to anything else that when it finally gets around so its sort-of-twist the momentum is lacking.

Closest comparison: It’s like James Bond with the soul of Once Upon a Time in the West.

Setting: Adventure
Plot: Action
Tone: Espionage