Book of Boba Fett - 1/5

Nothing in this show works. Boba Fett is emasculated, the side characters are a joke, the action scenes are unwatchably inane, and the plot manages to both make no sense and also go nowhere. It’s hard to make a character as cool as Boba Fett look weak and incompetent but this show does it constantly. Don’t expect to understand what’s at stake or what the character motivations are, because they’re constantly being thrown out with no forethought or reasoning. No matter how much you like Star Wars or how little you like to use your brain while watching shows, this one will still have you scratching your head at some point.

Closest comparison: It’s like The Mandalorian, but worse.

Setting: Sci-Fi
Plot: Adventure
Tone: Fantasy

Invincible (Amazon, 2021) - 3/5

This show takes the Spider-Man high school drama, combines it with a broader Avengers-style narrative, and wraps it all up in the gore that is much more realistic to the physics at work. The story isn’t as clever as it thinks it is, but it keeps the audience sufficiently curious and pays it off decently well in the end. It certainly lags in the middle and a few of the main side characters are insufferable, but they’re not a big enough part to ruin it completely. If you can stomach the extreme gore, it’s a fascinating watch.

Content warning: extreme violence, extreme blood, extreme gore

Closest comparison: It’s like Spider-Man by way of Kick-Ass with a Dexter (2006) plot woven in.

Setting: Marvel-Adjacent Super Heroes
Plot: Super Hero Origin
Tone: Brutal Action

Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker - 2/5

This is the Donald Trump of movies; it immediately begins dismantling everything its predecessor did. At least a dozen of the biggest plot holes from the last movie get directly addressed, which is a noble attempt but ends up making for a choppy, uneven film. It’s crammed to the gills with about three movies worth of plot and the first third especially plays out almost like a montage. Visually it’s not as stunning as The Last Jedi and its plot meanders, only knowing where it doesn’t want to go. So there’s good news and bad news. The good news is it’s much better than Star Wars: The Last Jedi, the bad news is it’s still not very good.

Closest comparison: It’s like Dragonball Z by way of Indiana Jones.

Setting: Sci-Fi
Plot: Fantasy
Tone: Adventure

Child's Play (2019) - 3/5

Don’t get me wrong, it’s a good movie, it’s just also very disposable. Changing black magic to technology is a great update to the classic setup, and it plays out in exactly the combination of scenarios you’d expect. Aubrey Plaza and Mark Hamill do a great job drawing in the audience and making the world feel lived-in and engaging, although the movie follows in its predecessor’s footsteps when it comes to contriving scenarios where a child’s doll could murder people. Still, it’s quite well made and if you’re a fan of ‘80s pop horror this is certainly in the same vein.

Content warning: gore

Closest comparison: An update to the classic ‘80s pop horror movie.

Setting: Sci-Fi Horror
Plot: Slasher
Tone: Pop Horror

Star Wars: The Last Jedi - 2/5

So much of this movie doesn't make sense, ranging characters' motivations to what people can actually do with the Force. It has a few really good shots of cinematography, and Adam Driver's acting was spot on. Most of the rest was problematic. There were 3-4 times I thought, "That was cool", but there were a good two dozen times I thought, "That was stupid". It's too long, and there's too much talking without people saying anything. Sorry guys, the movie's just not good.

Honestly, this one was right on the border for me between a 2/5 and 3/5. There was just too much that was downright stupid in it. There were three separate times during the movie when I took off my glasses and rubbed my eyes, shaking my head because the movie just made no sense.