Henry V (1989) - 4/5

This is the definitive version of Shakespeare’s play, brought to life by the inimitable Kenneth Branagh. If you already like The Bard you’ll love it, but even those unfamiliar with his works may find themselves enjoying the antiquated dialogue and some historical aspects of the plot. Then ending, though, features an abrupt change of tone which is a strange directoral choice.

Closest comparison: It’s Shakespeare by Kenneth Branagh. What more do you want?

Setting: War
Plot: Political
Tone: Stage Play

Artemis Fowl - 1/5

Nothing about this movie makes sense. Multiple times it goes out of its way to make sure the audience understands something, then has the opposite happen as if it were a payoff. The acting is very bad, with the notable exceptions of Josh Gad and Colin Farrell who are doing the best they can with what they’re given. The only consistently good thing about the movie is the set design, which is ruined by terribly choppy editing. There’s nothing to like about this movie, whether you’re a fan of the book series or not.

Closest comparison: It’s like Spy Kids by way of The Last Airbender (2010).

Setting: Hidden World
Plot: Ransom
Tone: Kids Adventure

Murder on the Orient Express (2017) - 3/5

It's good. It's fine. There's nothing wrong with it, but it's honestly pretty bland. For all the acting and directing talent available it is not very impressive, except for a few pretty great 'oners' if you're looking for them. If you're familiar with the story this movie holds no surprises for you. If not, it's a classic and this is a solid adaptation.